My only friend

In 7th grade your words hung around me like a noose strangling my individuality

I came to beLIEve every lie all the propaganda that came in one ear and never out the other.

And you were my only friend.

The night I sat there crying as the red and blue lights flashed shadows on the stairs above me.
Listening as the cops lectured you.
The look of failure in my mother’s eyes.
And you were my only friend.
The day you left beginning the rest of your life without me as your mini side kick.
This classic rite of passage left a hole burning in my heart.
Your phone calls every few weeks and trips home did not satisfy this emptiness.
And you were my only friend.
I remember the first time we kissed beneath the stars like diamonds in the sky like the dimond I pictured you someday bowing on one knee and placing on my finger
and a few months later when you almost died.
The scar you left across my heart will never fade away like you did when you chose drugs over me.
 And you were my only friend.
Then sophomore year when the only guy to ever call me beautiful ran away never to be seen again.
Looking in the mirrors I did not feel beautiful, I felt damaged and alone.
And you were my only friend.
The last day of high school, first day of college. I sat alone in "my" new room too nervous to talk to anyone I cried because I was terrified because I was all alone.
And you were my only friend.
When my Grandfather passed away tears streaming down my face.
Recollections of him laughing only a few months earlier.
The plans we had made to go to Mexico for a family reunion that he wouldn't be able to attend.
And you were my only friend.
Your lyrics wrap around me on cold, dark days and encourage me to keep going.
They pump me up for my soccer games when its nice out.
You are the only one who has been there through it all.

Music my best friend.